We had met our birth mom on a Wednesday. The following Tuesday she was to have a stitch removed from her cervix, called a cerclage, that had kept her cervix from dilating. Of course I had to Google what would happen when the stitch was removed! One of two things, she would either go into labour, or she would not, haha. Hmm. The day of the removal was two and a half weeks before her due date.
She didn't even make it to the Tuesday appointment! All day Monday the contractions were coming. By Wednesday morning the cerclage was out and the baby was ready to come!
Once Ben and I knew that most likely the baby would be born on Wednesday some time, we decided to head to the city as soon as Ben got off of work at 7pm. That meant getting our whole family all ready to live at my mom and dad's place in Edmonton for up to 10 days! I made lists and packed all day and loved every minute of it. It was finally happening and I couldn't wait to hit the road! We had spent so much time preparing, that when she went into labour it wasn't too tough to get everything together.
The baby was born at 7:47pm when we had just hit the road. We got the call from our social worker when we were almost in Edmonton to tell us that he had arrived, two and a half weeks early. 7 pounds 1 ounce, and everyone was doing well.
The plan was for us to be ready to go to the hospital the next morning. Our social worker would go there a few hours before us to meet with both birth parents and the lawyer. Papers needed to be signed that would give consent for the adoption. Once the papers were signed, the 10 day revocation period would begin.
We arrived at the hospital at 11:00am, and waited in the truck to be summoned. We thought that we might be needed before noon already, but the time ended up dragging on and on. Eventually I started watching Frozen on the little truck dvd player, and Ben went off to find food at a drug store. Around 1:30pm we were told to come in and meet with our social worker in the lobby.
We had a chance to look over the signed consent forms and medical histories of the birth parents. We were told by our social worker that, though this might be quite an uncomfortable situation for us, the birth parents' moms and about six other close friends and family members were in the hospital room! Oh man! When I had planned out this moment in my mind I had never pictured that many people in there, or what I would say to them. We started to get nervous but we figured getting through a few uncomfortable was a pretty small thing when considered the greater goal!
Thankfully, when we got the hospital room we found that the extended family members had gone downstairs for lunch so that we could have some private time with the birth parents. We hadn't met the birth dad yet, and we were very glad that he had chosen to be there. He had a chance to look through our profile book during that time and ask us questions if he wanted to, which he didn't.
When the extended family came back in there was a bit of awkwardness, but they were very welcoming of us. The birth dad's mom said right away that the family was "only there to support the adoption, meet the baby and say goodbye." They wanted to welcome us into the family! It was so kind of them to say those things and put us at ease right away. There had been a bit of worry in the back of my mind that they were there to try to change the birth parents' minds. The birth mom's mom was fairly emotional, but hugged me very tightly and and said, "thank you." We felt very good after meeting the family, and though it caused some anxiety initially, we feel like we may have set some of their minds at ease and helped them to feel more comfortable with the adoption.
After about two hours together, it was time for our birth mom to go home. We gave her some time alone with the baby while we had some lunch downstairs.
I don't know if there has ever been something more difficult to watch than a mother walking out of a hospital room without her baby. She cried, and so did I. I felt so much pain for her. Even though she was very confident in her decision, she loved him and walking away was incredibly difficult. She was so brave.
Once our birth mom had left with our social worker we were alone in the hospital room with the baby! "What do we do?" "Should we dress him?" "Is he ready to go?" The nurses didn't say much to us at all, just told us we could go.
It is very strange to walk out of a hospital with a baby. Strange in a good way.
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| We gave our birth mom this same giraffe. It is something that they can both have in common, that she can hold as a reminded of her precious boy. |
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| Opa was the first person to hold Luke when we got home. It was such a great coincidence that he was in town on this day! |
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| The smile says it all! |
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| First snuggles with grandpa. |
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| Grandma, just home from work. |
To be continued...
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